I remember vividly my husband’s first Father’s Day in June 2016: It was less than two weeks after I had given birth to our first child. We lived in a very, very small one-bedroom apartment in Birmingham, Alabama, far from family. He not only was new to parenthood but also was in the throes of a demanding doctoral program. Among other postpartum sufferings, I wound up in the hospital with sepsis and an antibiotic-resistant infection. We were in over our heads.

Instead of celebrating Father’s Day in all the typical ways, Dave took care of all the cooking and cleaning, ran several loads of laundry to catch up, and rocked the baby while I rested. He received no accolades, no fanfare, no congratulatory cigar — just a word of guilt from me, because I wished I could have done more to acknowledge everything he already had done as a new dad.

I didn’t realize at the time, but that was the first glimpse of my own personal St. Joseph: a spouse and father who would strive to do the right thing, no matter what, to serve and protect his family.

Subsequent years and the addition of three more children have shown, time and time again, that Dave has never required recognition while striving to imitate St. Joseph and the well-deserved titles for which he’s recognized in the Litany of St. Joseph: “Most Chaste,” “Most Prudent,” “Most Faithful,” “Mirror of Patience,” “Glory of Family Life,” “Terror of Demons.”

For the dad who feels exhausted from the day-to-day duties, perhaps the idea of being a St. Joseph to your family seems far-fetched. Perhaps you feel underappreciated for the long hours you put in at your job. Perhaps the never-ending to-do list at home seems to grow longer each day. Perhaps you feel jaded because you’ve sacrificed time and energy to provide for your family, and you’ve missed so many milestones in your kids’ lives as a result. Perhaps the lack of holy fatherly figures leaves you feeling uncertain about how to pass the faith on to your children or love your wife more selflessly.

No dad is going to be perfect — even St. Joseph, whom Scripture calls “a righteous man,” wasn’t perfect. However, through God’s grace, and because of his obedience and trust, he was able to respond to God’s call and do God’s will. He was faithful to his duties, his family and his God, and that was the key to his sanctity. He has been a model and spiritual father for Christians for 2,000 years and counting, and he wishes to be your spiritual father, too!

St. Teresa of Ávila summed up the power of his intercession well:

“Knowing by experience St. Joseph’s astonishing influence with God, I would wish to persuade everyone to honor him with particular devotion. I have always seen those who honored him in a special manner make progress in virtue, for this heavenly protector favors in striking manner the spiritual advancement of those who commend themselves to him.”*

Dave has been praying for the intercession of St. Joseph for years, and he has recognized the importance of regularly imploring the saint’s intercession for help to become a better husband and father. The prayer below, which Dave wrote for our book, The Prayer Book for Tired Parents, purely and simply spells out a father’s desire for holiness that has transformed our family. He has seen the fruits of St. Joseph’s intercession and hopes you too will seek out the help of your spiritual father as you lead your own family toward heaven!

The Prayer of a Father to St. Joseph**

St. Joseph, you embody all the virtues I hope to attain through God’s grace. I rely on your intercession and your guidance as I strive for holiness for myself and my family.

Adopt me as your spiritual son, so that I might learn from you.

Train me to hear God’s voice and discern His will, you who heard God even while sleeping.

Take me to Egypt with you, along with my family, and protect us from the evil that wishes to harm us.

Help me to model purity and chastity for my family, that my children might be truly free to embrace God’s vocation for them.

Show me how to exercise patience, that I might overcome my frustrations and embrace suffering.

Teach me holy silence, that my mind and my heart might be attuned to the presence of Jesus, especially in the Eucharist.

Lead me always to Jesus, that I might be able to gaze upon His Holy Face, in all its radiance, for all eternity.

I beg you, O glorious St. Joseph, to present my intentions before your Son, who always defers to you in holy obedience. Amen.

**©2022 David and Debbie Cowden. Reprinted with permission.

SLEEPING ST. JOSEPH

The statue pictured with this post is available from EWTN Religious Catalogue.